When it comes to birth order, I really lucked out with my kids so far. My oldest daughter is the perfect model for an oldest child. There are so many things going on in the world today and I just wanted to point out some of the good ones.
My children. This post is dedicated to Michaela Jones Griffith.
I became a mom on May 11, 2010. My water broke the day before and we waited and waited for my contractions to kick in but I ended up needing pitocin and an epidural in order to deliver her in the 24 hour window after my water broke. Every birth is special. But the birth of your first child is really two births. The birth of your baby and the birth of your motherhood. I remember nearly every detail of those whirlwind first few days at the hospital. My baby came out healthy with the sweetest covering of little blond whispy hair on her head. She was perfect. I can remember this time in such detail that it is mind blowing to me to think that it has been 7 years since that day. I could tell you all about Michaela at any or all of her various stages of growth but I am going to talk about her now.
She is 7. At times she seems like she is seconds away from being a teenager. Mood swings, emotional roller coasters, attitude. But then she is back to laughing at words like "poop" and "fart" and I remember that she is still just a kid. She is super smart. Always has been. She has been very verbal from a very young age and could identify all of her letters by the time she was 18 months old. (I do credit this with her being an only child until she was 2. I had so much time to devote to JUST HER, it was amazing!) First kids are lucky in that they have the full on devotion and attention of their parents. Subsequent children have the devotion but not the full-on attention that the first one gets. Such is life and birth order I guess.
Michaela is a nurturing soul. She is so motherly to her little sisters and every other person and child that she comes in contact with. I remember when I had a migraine a few years ago. I was laying in my bed and she was so worried about me. She kept coming in to check on me. When I woke up there were a few little potato chips sitting on my bed next to me. She had come in and left them there while I was sleeping in case I was hungry. She is so sweet. Even just the other night, I had a stomach bug. She came in a laid down next to me while I was in bed and put her head on my shoulder and said, "Mommy, I don't like it when you don't feel good." She got me a snack and some water and told me all about her day. I love her so much. She always looks for the kids who need something and gets it for them. She is the one who will set up a tea party for all of her friends complete with snacks for everyone. She loves her friends so much. She is very responsible. She knows the rules and she will follow them and "help" other kids to follow them too. She does a pretty good job being an emissary for her fellow kids when adult supervision is needed. She will come and report to us on things that are happening and when there is a problem. It is very helpful actually. She doesn't tattle for the most part. But she is very good at keeping the grown-ups involved when things need to be resolved. She keeps a level head when it comes to other kids.
Michaela is always along for the ride. She is so creative. She comes up with amazing games and scenarios and she is fantastic at finding alternative ways to make her ideas a reality. Example: when she was about 3 1/2 or 4 years old she wanted to learn how to tie her shoes. She told me she wanted to learn and so I offered to help her. NO WAY! She was going to "learn it herself." I tried to explain to her that if I showed her how to do it a few times she would know how to do it and then she could practice all by herself. NOPE! She didn't want me to show her. She wanted to figure it all out for herself. Because of that, she took a few weeks to try different ways of tying her shoes until she learned how. And then she did. She learned. It blew my mind that she could just "figure it out." And that she had the patience with herself to make mistake after mistake and try many different ways of doing something to find a solution that worked for her. I am not like that. I can follow a set of guidelines or rules and accomplish anything. This worked for me in school because I was able to listen to what the teacher told me to do to accomplish any task and I would follow it, step by step, and complete my task. I guess I was not much of a creative learner. But I got good grades. Michaela is willing to mess up if she can figure things out all on her own, in her own way and time. Even now, she has long beautiful blonde hair. She wanted to learn how to braid so I offered to show her how on Lucy's hair. NOPE! She just tried and tried different ways and now she is really good at braiding her hair. I respect her so much! She even is in the "gifted" program at school which is a program that celebrates alternative learners who seek for multiple solutions to problems and don't look at things in a traditional way. It's amazing to know that she is one of those people. She can be anything she wants to with that mindset. She will always be able to find a way!
She is also a perfectionist at times. She can get very very upset when she wants something to happen and it doesn't. (I don't know WHERE she gets that from...) She can be quick to anger at times, (also a family trait,) but she is also quick to move on. She doesn't hold a grudge and she is easily onto the next thing. She is a great traveler. We travel a lot in our family because we live so far away from our family. She has always flown and driven like a champ. She is patient and helpful. We had a flight last year where Adaline was a baby and she began to cry on the plane. Every parents worst nightmare. I couldn't calm her down for over 30 minutes. I tried everything and nothing was working. She was just mad. Luckily for me, this isn't my first rodeo so I actually wasn't that stressed out about it. I don't really care that much what other people think, I was just trying to take care of my baby. In the end, it was Michaela who calmed Adaline down. She sang her songs and gave her a toy that hadn't worked but then it did and she told her silly stories to make her laugh. Michaela was 6 at the time. 6! She is a godsend. God says that he gave Woman as a helpmeet for man, well I think he gave oldest daughters as a helpmeet for mothers! Seriously! She is amazing. I do not know what I would do without her.
I also worry about her. Her emotions are deep. A well that can be neverending. I know what it's like to live your life like this because this is me. I am an extremely emotional and sensitive human being. So, I suppose that should bring me comfort, knowing that she can still be so strong and will make it through anything. I trust her. I don't trust the world. All I can do is arm her with the tools she will need to navigate the storms of life. I am trying my hardest to do this successfully. I do not want to fail her. She is an entire world to me in one person. A universe that I cannot disconnect with my own. She has all the potential in the world and I can't wait to see all of the things that she will become! What a blessing is a daughter like her in my life as a mother!!
Here's to strong women! May we know them, may we raise them, may we be them!
I am doing my part to help this amazing and glorious girl become a woman of substance and contribution. I know she can do it all and I am so happy to be along for the ride.
Stef
My children. This post is dedicated to Michaela Jones Griffith.
Michaela at about 2 months old. Man, she is cute.
I became a mom on May 11, 2010. My water broke the day before and we waited and waited for my contractions to kick in but I ended up needing pitocin and an epidural in order to deliver her in the 24 hour window after my water broke. Every birth is special. But the birth of your first child is really two births. The birth of your baby and the birth of your motherhood. I remember nearly every detail of those whirlwind first few days at the hospital. My baby came out healthy with the sweetest covering of little blond whispy hair on her head. She was perfect. I can remember this time in such detail that it is mind blowing to me to think that it has been 7 years since that day. I could tell you all about Michaela at any or all of her various stages of growth but I am going to talk about her now.
Taken yesterday after her fun-run at school.
She is 7. At times she seems like she is seconds away from being a teenager. Mood swings, emotional roller coasters, attitude. But then she is back to laughing at words like "poop" and "fart" and I remember that she is still just a kid. She is super smart. Always has been. She has been very verbal from a very young age and could identify all of her letters by the time she was 18 months old. (I do credit this with her being an only child until she was 2. I had so much time to devote to JUST HER, it was amazing!) First kids are lucky in that they have the full on devotion and attention of their parents. Subsequent children have the devotion but not the full-on attention that the first one gets. Such is life and birth order I guess.
Looking older and older every day.
Michaela is a nurturing soul. She is so motherly to her little sisters and every other person and child that she comes in contact with. I remember when I had a migraine a few years ago. I was laying in my bed and she was so worried about me. She kept coming in to check on me. When I woke up there were a few little potato chips sitting on my bed next to me. She had come in and left them there while I was sleeping in case I was hungry. She is so sweet. Even just the other night, I had a stomach bug. She came in a laid down next to me while I was in bed and put her head on my shoulder and said, "Mommy, I don't like it when you don't feel good." She got me a snack and some water and told me all about her day. I love her so much. She always looks for the kids who need something and gets it for them. She is the one who will set up a tea party for all of her friends complete with snacks for everyone. She loves her friends so much. She is very responsible. She knows the rules and she will follow them and "help" other kids to follow them too. She does a pretty good job being an emissary for her fellow kids when adult supervision is needed. She will come and report to us on things that are happening and when there is a problem. It is very helpful actually. She doesn't tattle for the most part. But she is very good at keeping the grown-ups involved when things need to be resolved. She keeps a level head when it comes to other kids.
Adaline fell asleep up on Michaela's chest while they were watching a movie in my bed.
Michaela is always along for the ride. She is so creative. She comes up with amazing games and scenarios and she is fantastic at finding alternative ways to make her ideas a reality. Example: when she was about 3 1/2 or 4 years old she wanted to learn how to tie her shoes. She told me she wanted to learn and so I offered to help her. NO WAY! She was going to "learn it herself." I tried to explain to her that if I showed her how to do it a few times she would know how to do it and then she could practice all by herself. NOPE! She didn't want me to show her. She wanted to figure it all out for herself. Because of that, she took a few weeks to try different ways of tying her shoes until she learned how. And then she did. She learned. It blew my mind that she could just "figure it out." And that she had the patience with herself to make mistake after mistake and try many different ways of doing something to find a solution that worked for her. I am not like that. I can follow a set of guidelines or rules and accomplish anything. This worked for me in school because I was able to listen to what the teacher told me to do to accomplish any task and I would follow it, step by step, and complete my task. I guess I was not much of a creative learner. But I got good grades. Michaela is willing to mess up if she can figure things out all on her own, in her own way and time. Even now, she has long beautiful blonde hair. She wanted to learn how to braid so I offered to show her how on Lucy's hair. NOPE! She just tried and tried different ways and now she is really good at braiding her hair. I respect her so much! She even is in the "gifted" program at school which is a program that celebrates alternative learners who seek for multiple solutions to problems and don't look at things in a traditional way. It's amazing to know that she is one of those people. She can be anything she wants to with that mindset. She will always be able to find a way!
Michaela saw a video where someone made a little beach scene. So she and Lucy got supplies and toys and made a beach scene of their own.
She is also a perfectionist at times. She can get very very upset when she wants something to happen and it doesn't. (I don't know WHERE she gets that from...) She can be quick to anger at times, (also a family trait,) but she is also quick to move on. She doesn't hold a grudge and she is easily onto the next thing. She is a great traveler. We travel a lot in our family because we live so far away from our family. She has always flown and driven like a champ. She is patient and helpful. We had a flight last year where Adaline was a baby and she began to cry on the plane. Every parents worst nightmare. I couldn't calm her down for over 30 minutes. I tried everything and nothing was working. She was just mad. Luckily for me, this isn't my first rodeo so I actually wasn't that stressed out about it. I don't really care that much what other people think, I was just trying to take care of my baby. In the end, it was Michaela who calmed Adaline down. She sang her songs and gave her a toy that hadn't worked but then it did and she told her silly stories to make her laugh. Michaela was 6 at the time. 6! She is a godsend. God says that he gave Woman as a helpmeet for man, well I think he gave oldest daughters as a helpmeet for mothers! Seriously! She is amazing. I do not know what I would do without her.
On her birthday this year. She had a unicorn-themed party.
I also worry about her. Her emotions are deep. A well that can be neverending. I know what it's like to live your life like this because this is me. I am an extremely emotional and sensitive human being. So, I suppose that should bring me comfort, knowing that she can still be so strong and will make it through anything. I trust her. I don't trust the world. All I can do is arm her with the tools she will need to navigate the storms of life. I am trying my hardest to do this successfully. I do not want to fail her. She is an entire world to me in one person. A universe that I cannot disconnect with my own. She has all the potential in the world and I can't wait to see all of the things that she will become! What a blessing is a daughter like her in my life as a mother!!
On the first day of school. Fall 2017.
Here's to strong women! May we know them, may we raise them, may we be them!
I am doing my part to help this amazing and glorious girl become a woman of substance and contribution. I know she can do it all and I am so happy to be along for the ride.
Stef
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